Hailey Rowe  00:00

But the truth is we want to always look at, look at how far you've come look at the days you did do it, look at the times where you were capable and ride on that, like, embrace that and be like, I am someone who can do this and who can be consistent. And it doesn't have to be every day. But if but if I have a day I skip it. It doesn't discredit how far you've come or how many beads you do have in your jar. So I think it's really important to get your brain more focused on the gains and tracking the wins, and understanding that also the bigger goals and life you want to live, the bigger days you're gonna mess up days, you're gonna have failures.

Bridget Moroney  00:50

Welcome to the performance RX podcast where the conversations are about health, nutrition and mindset for anyone who considers themself an athlete from the most elite competitors to those who are simply seeking to improve their athletic performance. We hope the knowledge shared on this show will empower you to reach your physical potential. Thank you so much for tuning in. Now for today's episode. Hey, everyone. Welcome to today's show. I'm your host, Bridget Moroney. And today my guest is Hailey Rowe. Hailey is a certified human potential coach, behavioral change specialist and a business coach for individuals who want to double their sales, overcome overwhelm and perfectionism and get more done in less time. She is the host of the health coach nation podcast, a show for health and life coaches who want to grow their businesses since 2010. Hailey has worked in the coaching industry and has been titled one of the top 25 coaches in Chicago today, Hailey and I sit down and have a conversation about consistency. Hopefully, it's no mystery to anyone right now. But consistency really is the secret sauce when it comes to performing your best day in and day out time and time again, people who achieve great things, the biggest thing that comes down to it is their consistency. So Hailey and I have a little conversation, we break down what it is to be consistent in the first place and how you can go about setting up your own systems of consistency so that you can perform your very best. Enjoy the show. Hey, everyone, how's it going today? I have Hailey Rowe with me and we're going to have a little conversation around consistency in health and nutrition coaching. How's it going Hailey?

Hailey Rowe  02:28

It's going well, thank you so much for having me.

Bridget Moroney  02:32

Yeah, thanks for being here. Um, so I guess before we begin, I gave a little bit of an introduction with your background and and currently you work with health and nutrition coaches, but you didn't start that way you actually started as a personal trainer and nutrition specialist. So I don't know if you want to give like just maybe a brief background and how that evolved for you, for anyone who's listening.

Hailey Rowe  02:55

Yeah, of course. So I started in the coaching industry in 2010, got a bunch of different certifications wasn't sure how I wanted it all to play together. And ended up getting my bachelor's in entrepreneurship always had an interest in business and health and personal development. And so I was doing some coaching on the side, some wellness stuff, working, and training the tennis team at my school and teaching classes and all this kind of stuff. But eventually, after college, I started working in business development and marketing for wellness startups. And I loved doing that, because I felt like I was enhancing their opportunity to make the world a healthier place, by helping them grow their business and you know, expand. So that was kind of my mission. And eventually I went off on my own helping health and wellness professionals grow their business, because ultimately, being able to use those skills is going to make the world a healthier place. So I wanted to help them attract clients and do that kind of thing. And of course, I do still do a little bit of behind the scenes coaching, when it comes to life coaching and health coaching with some clients who are my favorites, but that's kind of where I'm at.

Bridget Moroney  04:08

And I like what you said about like, kind of making the world a healthier place. Because I think, you know, my personal viewpoint or philosophy is like, you know, anyone whether they're a coach, an executive, a business owner, an athlete or just someone who's just trying to live their everyday life, like we all want to be healthy we all want you know, we all have these bodies that we live in and need them to to work well. So I like that and I like how like yeah, like you said behind the scene coaching like health coaching and nutrition like that applies to anyone really, um, but But yeah, getting into to consistency here. And again, it's one of those things where I think no matter what a person's doing, consistency is a big factor whether you're building a business, whether you are trying to lose weight or get healthy or whatever it is that you're trying to pursue. Consistency is a huge factor. But it's also something that I, in my opinion, I think a lot of people underestimate. And so, yeah, and so yeah, I would love to hear more about kind of like, what your thoughts are on that?

Hailey Rowe  05:19

Yeah. So I think the thing about consistency is it's kind of vague meaning consistency, the definition of it is going to be different to everybody. So I think anytime you're trying to form a new habit, you want to first ask yourself, what does being consistent with this habit actually mean for me? So does it mean doing it every day? Or does it mean doing it three times a week? Does it mean doing it on holidays? Does it mean not doing it on holidays? Like asking yourself those specific questions like What are your exceptions to, to when it's okay to not be consistent, because if we don't define it, and we don't have a clear objective or target, it becomes a reason to beat ourselves up or say we're inconsistent or, like, feel bad about the goal, because we've kind of just been vague and like, hoping it would just be perfect, and it's never like that. So I think that's the first thing when it comes to consistency. I agree. It's underrated. But I also think it can be overused and under defined, and then people feel kind of just throw in the towel before they've even really tried.

Bridget Moroney  06:31

Oh, my gosh, yeah. Um, I think you said it perfectly. Because, yeah, there's that underrated and then as you pointed out, the the other side of the spectrum there is, is it's overused. And yeah, people think that consistency means 100% Perfection, like, and again, like using the fitness industry. As an example, there, you see all of these influencers, and all of these people on Instagram, Tik Tok, wherever, and it's like, every day, no excuses and this kind of that kind of narrative there. Right. And I think for for a lot of people that that can be discouraging, because if that's the only definition that's being put out there, then it's like, first of all, like, why even try, but then maybe they do attempt it? And like you said, it's just another reason to beat yourself up.

Hailey Rowe  07:28

Yeah, absolutely. And that's actually a lot of times people think beating themselves up is going to make them work harder, or do better the next time. And it's the complete opposite. Because when you beat yourself up, you never give yourself the opportunity to evaluate with a more data driven, objective mindset so that you can keep improving and refining. Because instead of just dismissing it with like, oh, I messed up, I better do better the next time you better figure it out, which doesn't give any opportunity to be like, huh, I want to look at that situation. And I want to see what went wrong. What was I thinking that drove me to do that? How was I feeling in that moment? What can I maybe try next time to make sure I am consistent with it? What do I want to learn from this opportunity? Like, we never usually we just shut it down by beating ourselves up that compared to actually taking the time to evaluate.

Bridget Moroney  08:25

It's just like so many things in any type of coaching or you know, especially like health and nutrition, like you can't fix what you don't track and so, yeah, is it something? Was it just a one off? Or was it something that is fundamentally you know, I don't want to say wrong, but just, you know, fund like that needs improvement and whatever you're trying to do. So, I guess with that said, like, how do you whether it was you know, previously you know, in the beginning of your coaching journey, or even now with working with entrepreneurs and and other coaches, regardless of the client and their goal, how do you get them out of that perfectionist mindset of all or nothing? And, you know, get them to either, like you say, like, reevaluate what's gone, you know, what, what they what they need to change or just simply just be imperfectly, imperfectly consistent.

Hailey Rowe  09:17

Yeah, definitely. Well, I think there's a couple things Number one, we have to check our language about everything and our stories about everything. So anytime you feel like you quote, unquote, messed up, or fell off the wagon, or it you know, just can't, for some reason, there's something that others have that you don't have. You have to realize you're picking that identity for yourself. And that's just a story. It's not an actual fact. So the truth is you chose and this is another thing we do is we dismiss the habit choice we made and just said well, you know, XYZ took over me then all of a sudden, I was just eating these chips, and I couldn't stop, like you are putting the chips in your mouth. And that's fine. But you got to own, the only way you could start to improve is to own that you made that choice. So I think the first step is like, really, like, how are you talking to yourself? And how are you talking about the situation because if you and having more discipline when it comes to not like being almost like a parent to yourself, and being like, we don't talk back to ourselves that way, or we don't talk to ourselves that way. So if you're being like, Oh, I'm just such a loser, because I keep messing this up. It has just, you're gonna continue to have perfectionism because you're so afraid of that mental beat down, if you mess up. If you talk to yourself that way. So the first step is to be like, it's okay to mess up. Sometimes it's human nature to mess up. Sometimes I'm aware and planning that I am gonna mess up sometimes. And just kind of familiarizing yourself with more loose language and how you speak to yourself. The second thing is, making sure that you have like, I actually think if you are a perfectionist, you can kind of redirect it towards being more perfectionistic, about evaluating and improving the actual habit you're trying to do compared to being perfect with the habit, if that makes sense. So if you want to be perfect, the only like an I also think being perfect or thinking you have high standards. Sometimes it's also a coping mechanism, or a way to have us like, protect, like, not fully try, like really, I'm just not even going to get my attention to that thing. Because if I'm going to do it, I have to do it all in. And so I'm not even going to start the process. And so it delays us from starting as well. So I'd say that second tip has to do with making sure that you're going to, like, give yourself, I forgot what I was even talking about. Hold on, I'm having a brain moment. Um, I don't know, I'm gonna pause because I'm losing my train of thought. But the point is, you got it. And I forgot the original question. But the point is, when it comes to perfectionism, you have to understand that it's not helping you even though you think it is. And you have to be honest with yourself and plan for the obstacles, plan for the thoughts that you think you just want to get rid of. And never think again, like, if you have urges for certain foods or something, rather than avoiding them and be like, next time around, I'm not going to do it. Plan for them be like, I know this is going to come up and how do I want to respond when I want to start talking to myself, what's one small level up. And the last thing I'd say for perfectionist is good, better best choices. So it doesn't always have to be best. But it should be in your defined spectrum of good, better best. And then you could start to feel good about the traction you're making. And when you feel good about the traction you make you're making, it actually motivates you to work, keep doing it, as opposed to a lot of people think if I feel too good about myself, I'm gonna loosen the gas. I'm gonna, you know, like, not try as hard, which is not true.

Bridget Moroney  13:07

No, again, I think it kind of goes back to that all or nothing mentality that a lot of people think and I maybe just the Misguided notions of what consistency is. And I love the good, better, best challenges because one that's empowering to people because it's like, yeah, again, it doesn't have to be 100%, organic, green vegetables and meats, you know, especially if, if we put it into the context of, you know, people want to go out and live their lives, they want to go on a date with a partner, or just out with friends or family celebration, it's like, people have to live their lives. And so even though they have these goals, and they maybe have certain parameters around these goals, what are you going to live your whole life avoiding these social situations? No. Because, you know, like, just speaking about health, like health is more than just what we put in our bodies. It's our it's our you know, socialization it's our it's, it's, it's the relationships we have that also gives our life meaning and mental wellness, but um, yeah, so you go to the restaurant, and it's like, okay, what, what are my options here, so you don't feel like you have to completely limit yourself. Um, so I guess with that said, um, and and going into what you said at the beginning of people need to define what is consistent for them, right? Is it every day at the gym without fail? Or is it you know, three days a week whenever I can fit it in and I have seven days. And I guess that's kind of it is, I think, in my opinion, I think small actions done consistently can have even especially for people who are trying to make A change in the beginning can have such a big profound effects because it's those small wins adding up. And so I guess when you have worked with clients in the past or when you do work with clients who maybe are working on just doing something consistently, even however small it is like what are what are some maybe your your things that you have them work on?

15:22

Yeah, great question. So I think you're right. The first thing I don't know if you're familiar with like James clear and atomic habits, he always talks about, you want to have frequency of the habit first, compared to optimizing the habit. So in other words, people who want to go to the gym, your first feat is to just get yourself over there for 10 minutes, even if you just drive there, walk in and walk on the treadmill for five minutes, that's the frequency of that is going to get your building momentum in the right direction. And then you're gonna keep adding, and a lot of people are like, well dance too small to count, but you have to look also at the opportunity costs of your perfectionist mindset that's causing you to not even go at all to the gym, or go and then like, be like workout so hard that then you have to take three days off because you can't walk. And so you know, it's not working for you clearly. So try this small little thing first and watch yourself start to build trust with yourself. Because that's the first thing you have to do is like, building that reliability with yourself that I am going to show up is key. So the other thing I like to do, though, with clients who want to start a new habit is have some way to gamify it a little bit or kind of make it fun and interesting. So one thing that I love from The Life Coach School is they have this thing called the urge jar. And basically what it means is any time let's say there's a habit you want to do or a habit you want to stop doing. So if you want to, let's say stop overeating, or stop eating, snacking after dinner or something you might have, you have to learn the process to allow the feeling of an urge. And so for most people, it's going to feel like restless, it's going to feel really awkward, you're going to feel like you want to walk right into the kitchen and open the pantry. You might even notice yourself doing that without noticing you're doing it. So the key to start to break that habit is to create a pause and to notice the feeling of an urge and process it and allow it and know it's harmless. Without responding to it feelings are actually harmless. It's when we react to the feelings like we have a fit, or we punch someone or we go eat that when that's when the feelings have an issue. So rather than like pushing them away, welcoming the feelings. And when you do that, and whether no matter whether you give yourself 10 minutes to feel it or like set a timer and see how long it takes for the urge to go away. That is something you can do to allow the urge to not do the reward of eating that keeps your brain stuck in that habit. And with the urge Are you going to put a bead in your urge jar and the goal is to hit 100 of them. And when you hit 100 of them, you're going to be so much better at not overeating after dinner not snacking after dinner that now becomes innate. And it's definitely a habit, hopefully by then. And if not, you just keep repeating it until it is right. So that's a way to kind of have your brain seeing, Oh, wow, I'm making progress. Oh, I gotta bead in my jar. Because, of course the bedt in the jar. It's not like this amazing reward that tastes as good as a ice cream bar. But it is a reward for your brain a little bit to be able to see the accomplishment. And it's kind of like a way for you to have something because if you don't have anything to look forward to, it's going to be really hard when you're trying to learn how to process urges. So I'd say that's one and then I think the other thing is daily questions in the morning like so, if you have a habit or you want to reinforce a new habit, asking yourself how can I make this habit easier on myself today? How can I plan it into my day? What might come up for me today? That's going to make me not want to do this? And how do I want to respond? And can I visualize that? Who could I ask for help today when it comes to this habit like so little questions like that, as opposed to what most people do is they ask themselves questions like Why can I figure this out? Why am I so bad at getting this done? You know what's wrong with me that I can't figure this out? Like you got to shift the questions. So that's something we do as well.

Bridget Moroney  19:42

Yeah, again, it's like going back to just beating yourself up or just talking you know, very negatively to yourself. A couple of things I love the the be the Yeah, the beads and the urge jar there because that that that ties into our motivation. The people think and and I talk about this a lot with with clients and and other coaches, you know, in fitness and nutrition is that, especially when it comes to exercise because not everyone is inherently not everyone loves exercise working out, and that's fine. But, you know, for whatever reason, maybe it's it's something that that, you know is necessary or they want to pursue and so yeah, that motivation. People think like, oh, you're just motivated to go to the gym and that's not necessarily the case. It's it's the action that then goes into the you know that that allows the motivation to come through. But yeah, so like what you're talking about what we're talking about, it's behavior change. And that's something that's it's abstract, it's you can't see it, your body is not physically moving or even like, with something like weight loss, like you start to see your clothes fitting better. And that motivates you like, again, we're talking about habit behavior change, and that doesn't, it's not obvious. So yeah, having that I love that visual reminder there. Because like you said, I guess I don't know, is it dopamine, or whatever that's like, when we is that what we get when we like, accomplish something?

Hailey Rowe  21:06

I don't know. The other thing is what I like I like what you said there about the motivation. A lot of times I think people think habits are supposed to feel amazing, or like they're waiting for that time, when the motivation and the willpower just drives them the whole time. And all the sudden etc things just shift and next time, they're gonna feel more motivated, compared to realizing habits forming a new thing that's new for your brain, it's a new neural pathway you haven't built yet. It's going to feel bad, it's going to feel really uncomfortable, it's going to feel like you should be doing something else. And almost like this primal instinct, like no, I'm so used to this other thing, I have to go do that. And so I think just becoming more okay with the fact that it's not supposed to always feel good in the beginning. And the sooner you can get more comfortable with feeling those harmless feelings of like, oh, this just feels bad, the sooner you're going to actually be able to reinforce that new habit. And it's kind of like that experiment they do with the dogs about like the bell ringing and all that and then they start drooling for that food, but they, they what they started to do is not give them the food or whatever. And so then the dogs salivating started to dry up over time, because they stopped getting the reward. And so then their body learned to like, adjust and not expect it. So it's the same thing with our own brains and forming new habits.

Bridget Moroney  22:35

It's yeah, people don't realize that our, our brains, our bodies in general, like homeostasis, just balance, you know, it's, um, it's uncomfortable to change. And that's part of our evolution, like not changing meant not doing something wild or crazy, that could quite literally put you at risk. So yeah, our brains now kind of keep us in that as you know, the proverbial comfort zone there for that reason, um, you were talking about neural pathways and, and rewiring our brain. So that's that's the other on the opposite spectrum. That's the amazing thing about our brains is we can quite literally change the way we think, behave, believe it doesn't happen automatically. But it's, it's an amazing process, like we're not stuck, you know, doing what we're doing forever. And so with that said, I wanted to bring up the topic of and have a 30, 30 day challenges or 60, day, 90 day challenges, whatever it is, and I've talked about this with other coaches, but I'm curious what your thoughts are, because on one end, there is that that consistency there. But on the other end, and this is the conversation that I had with another nutrition coach, Sheena Lawrick was one what happens on day 31? Or like the popular one now is 75 hard what happens on day? 76?

Hailey Rowe  24:04

Yeah, well, I think that it's good to give yourself a target or a challenge that's specific, because going back to the whole motivation thing, and novelty thing, it kind of helps yourself out with that meaning you're going to be if it's a 30 day challenge, and you're in a group and it's it's there's daily motivation, and whatever. Of course, that's a nice thing to have for forming a new habit. And that's a good way to help yourself out. But I think and also gets your brain focused on this doesn't have to be permanent, which I think sometimes can be useful meaning if you think tomorrow, you have to cold turkey forever for the rest of your life, do XYZ habit. Your brain is kind of gonna freak out before you even start. But if you know it's only 30 days and maybe you have a celebration or you you have like that's just the target Right now, then that's good. It's kind of like that whole quote about like, you only need to see the next step in the staircase, you don't have to focus on the whole staircase, right. So that can be useful. But the key is, if you want to do it for the rest of your life, it should be a habit that's sustainable to do for the rest of your life. So if this, you know, if you're finding and you can always level up so what I would suggest is Pick something you can stick to to begin with, I always do this when I'm talking about social media posts with coaches, like because they're like, How often should I post? Should I post every single day? And I'm like, No, start with just the basics of like, if you can only commit for sure to three times a week, do that for right now for the next 60 days, and then reevaluate, do you want to add more, and then maybe you can have the skill set and the time and the freedom to do that? Because you've practiced this so much consistently by doing three posts a week, right? So I think if you're gonna do something like a 30 day challenge, you have to ask yourself, number one, is this just a sprint I want to do for 30 days? And am I okay, with kind of taking a pause or reevaluating how often I want to do this habit after the 30 days. And then number two, after the 30 days is up, I think you got to ask yourself, Is this reevaluate? Is this sustainable for the rest of my life? Or do I want to find a better balance with this current habit that will be more sustainable?

Bridget Moroney  26:23

I love that. You just mentioned it just now. And then previous, you were talking about, like, just different ways you work with clients, like this line of questioning, because I think and I don't want to necessarily say this is why people fail. But I think, you know, I guess reality is, this may be why some people aren't as successful or they could be more successful is, is like taking a step back. And and evaluating these things. Like you mentioned before. Asking questions around, and I guess that's kind of it, it's like anticipating obstacles and things like that, like, you know, I'm trying to do this habit, what could prevent me from from accomplishing this? What could get in the way? Or if you did miss the habit, or whatever you're trying to develop? They're like, asking yourself again, like, what happened? What what wrong, like retrace the steps versus as you mentioned, like, why can't I do this? Why am I so and then whatever, you know, self deprecating language you want to put in there just to make yourself feel terrible?

Hailey Rowe  27:34

Right? Yeah.

Bridget Moroney  27:38

Um, so question. So you, yourself are coach, you're an entrepreneur, you have a podcast, I imagine you also, perhaps have your own kind of routine when it comes to health and, you know, fitness or anything, just taking care of your body? How do you stay consistent with all of that? Because it's a lot.

Hailey Rowe  28:01

Yeah, thank you. Yeah, it is, it is a lot. Um, I would say. So a couple things. One, I use the goal streaks app to track if there's specific habits I want to be building, I will put them in there and I will track it's just as simple as putting an X in the day for the calendar if you did it or not. And then over time, you can start to see your progress. So for me, one of them, at the end of the month, I'll I'll do a percentage, like how consistent was I with this. And in the beginning, it was like 60, like, well, maybe even less than that maybe 40% of the time, and then it was like 50%. And it wasn't linear. I think that's an important thing to point out. Sometimes consistency and building it and building a new habit isn't it doesn't always have to be linear. So like with that urge jar thing I talked about, it doesn't have to be consecutive days that you do that some days, you're gonna allow an urge and some days you're not. And it's okay. You don't have to start over get out of this whole, start over things. Otherwise, you will never be able to build consistency, because every single time you're starting over, so that's the one you know, goal streaks app helps me see Am I growing overall, on a big, big picture scale? Am I growing? The other thing that I do is I use an app called toggl. It's spelled T O GGL. And I time my if there's something that I want to hit a target for, like, let's say I want to produce, you know, X amount of hours per week on whatever habit or I want practicing a skill or whatever it is, or I want to like for me, I have a three hour a week workout target. That's my target and it can be Pilates. It can be strength training, it could be whatever I want. But that's like by the end of the week. I want to see the that I did that. And so toggl helps me It sends me a report at the end of the week to track that. And the other thing I'd say is know your basics like so for me, the thing I do every day, this doesn't even count towards the workout thing is I go for a walk every day. And that is like my non negotiable, my agreement with myself, my clear my head time, my maybe my podcast or audiobook time. And it's something that is become so consistent that it feels weird if I'm not doing it. And it's only one thing, meaning I don't have 12 Different things I do every single day no matter what it's kind of only I have maybe like three things I do every single day no matter what, which is like my journaling my walk. And you know, some of my one of my business tasks that I stay consistent with every day. So I think my tip there would be like pick what prioritize what's most important to you to be like your non negotiable habit to start with. And then you can keep adding more in and, you know, refining, as we talked about. So those are some of the ways I stay consistent. And I would say I also have believed in coaching and have had coaches and have coach have a coach and you know, I love that kind of stuff. Because I do think there is something to being having skin in the game. Having somebody keeping you accountable. Having a different perspective, sometimes when you can't see something you've been doing, maybe that's not helping yourself. Things like that.

Bridget Moroney  31:35

Blindspots. Yeah. Yeah, again, we didn't mention this, or I guess we kind of like briefly mentioned it, but I think this is another reason why people get attracted to like the 30 day 90 day challenges is because they have that accountability. Or like you said, the skin in the game, like, you know, I'm gonna pay 100 bucks to my gym or whatever, and possibly win a prize or whatever, I'm there. Yeah, I love the apps. Again, it kind of just goes back to like having that, that way to track it. But it's also a visual there. And, and I like that you take a step further and use, like the percentages, they're kind of going back to that definition of, you know, does it need to be 100%? You know, I have a background in education. And so if you go buy a lot of, I guess, what do you call it like grade scales? There like, 70% for a lot of schools. That's a C. And I know you mentioned the, The Life Coach School there with Brooke Castillo. She's said this before, like, be good or be be okay with with? Was it b minus work? Or basically C? Or B plus work there? Yeah.

Hailey Rowe  32:50

Yeah. Yeah, I love that. I totally agree.

Bridget Moroney  32:54

Because again, like, again, like using the, the metaphor, the analogy of school, like, the C students are going to pass everyone you know. So, you know, just depends again, on on goals and things like that. Um, and yeah, and you also mentioned, the, the, the, the starting over, and this is something that I read as well. Which, I guess kind of ties back into how you use the percentages, like the idea of using weekly streaks versus daily streaks there because and I forget where I read this, but it was someone talking about, I guess, meditation, and there was somebody who had meditated for, I don't know, like, 167 days in a row. And it was amazing. And wow. And then for whatever reason, they missed the next day, and just never meditated again, it was just again, all or nothing.

Hailey Rowe  33:49

Oh, wow, I was just gonna say there's a book called The Gap and The Gain by Dan Sullivan. And it talks about how so often like so that person who did 100, whatever days of meditating, the day they messed up, they met They discredited and totally miss acknowledged the 100 whatever days they had been consistent and focused on the gap. And then that gap took over all the gain. But the truth is, we want to always look at, look at how far you've come look at the days you did do it. Look at the times where you were capable, and ride on that, like, embrace that and be like, I am someone who can do this and who can be consistent. And it doesn't have to be every day. But if but if I have a day I skip it. It doesn't discredit how far you've come or how many beads you do have in your jar. So I think it's really important to get your brain more focused on the gains and tracking the wins and understanding that also the bigger goals and life you want to live the bigger days, you're gonna mess up days you're gonna have failures. times, like, when the bar is high, you're gonna have losses, you're gonna have more of those things. It comes as a packaged deal. So I would be more like, oh, wow, I only missed X amount of days and my journey that doesn't have to mean anything terrible like, Oh, now I, I messed up and now I can't go back and that kind of thing.

Bridget Moroney  35:29

Now going back again to like, I guess kind of the the evolution of our brains reminds they're like, We humans are inherently negative. Like, and that's no disrespect, like we have a negative bias or a negativity bias. Because again, that's just like, kept us safe back in the day, right? Like, oh, that looks sketchy. Don't. So yeah, but yeah, really focusing on the positive. Like, yeah, it's so cool. Like, I don't know, there was like this, what this anecdote there? Are this this joke where like, this kid had a, I don't know, what was it? Like? They got like a, a seven on their, their math test or whatever. And instead of being like, Well, you got 93% of it wrong. It's like, I got 7%. Right. So yeah, awesome. Um, well, yeah, I mean, I think, you know, we've talked so I mean, there's, again, there's, there's so much to say, or that we could say about consistency and building habits. But I think just like kind of focusing on on those fundamental things that you brought up, is just something that a lot of people miss, is there. Is there anything else that you feel like we might have missed? Or if there is, you know, again, like someone who wants to change their habit, like anything, just fundamental that where they could start?

Hailey Rowe  37:00

For sure. Yes. So I think two things, one, the power of constraint is something I would leave it with. So a lot of times we put, if you think about like, arrows coming out of a circle, if you have a lot of habits you're trying to form, the arrows are going to be pretty short, because you're kind of like spreading yourself thin and trying to do a lot at once and have a lot of interests all at the same time, that maybe aren't going as far as they could is if you constrained. But when you constrain imagine all the desire, the energy, the effort, you're channeling into just a couple arrows, and how much further out they can go. So I would say to anybody who's felt like they have a lot on their plate, and they're very busy, and they want to form new habits. Give yourself that gift to make one main goal, one main habit one thing first. And the byproduct effect of that probably will have a domino effect on other areas of your life, whether you realize it or not, it's not. And you can still have a maintenance mode for your other things in your life so that you're not just going to, you know, you're not going to say I'm going to eat healthy now. And so therefore, I'm not going to hang out with my friends. No, you're gonna learn how to eat healthier in those environments with your friends, and keep your friends you know, in maintenance, still hanging out with your friends, right? But there needs to be a definition or deal with yourself like, Hey, I'm going to really focus on this one habit. And I'm going to constrain sometimes, or I'm going to have a maintenance mode for these other areas. And then the last thing I'll say is for anybody who wants to form stronger consistency, I have a three day free consistency challenge and consistency planner, and it's at Haileyrowe.com/consistency.

Bridget Moroney  38:46

Nice. Yeah, so speaking of So Haileyrowe.com Is your website for anyone, so definitely go check out for anyone who's listening, go grab that, that plan or from her super useful tool there. Beyond your website, where else can people find you on social media? You also have a podcast.

Hailey Rowe  39:07

Yeah. Well, thanks again for having me. And I do have a podcast called Health Coach nation. We cover mindset marketing, sales and time management for coaches. But I also have Instagram @hailey_rowe, it's at Haley underscore row and the health coach nation Facebook community if you're looking to connect with other business owners and get business tips and that kind of thing.

Bridget Moroney  39:33

Awesome. Yeah, and you know, again, thank you for being on here. This has been this has been fun. I love talking about all this stuff like mindset consistency and yeah, it's it's, uh, I guess like we said in the beginning, it's it is a very empowering thing once people realize that they can change you know, their behavior, their their habits and everything else like that. It's just just Take a little bit of time in consistency. So yeah, absolutely awesome. Well, thank you so much again, Hailey. It's it's really been a pleasure for. For everyone who's listening. Thank you for tuning in. And yeah, please go check out Hailey on social media on her website, download the consistency book. And yeah, we'll see you next time. All right. That's all for today's show. Thank you so much again, for listening. And be sure to head over to aspiretocoaching.com/podcast, check out the show notes for today's episode. There, you'll find some of the links we've mentioned on today's podcast, as well as some of the previous episodes we've done. And while you're there, please make sure you sign up for our show updates. I am always updating the show and bringing in bonus content. So you do not want to miss out on any of that. One last thing. If you loved this episode, and you think a friend would really enjoy it as well, grab the link and share it out for me please. It really does help spread the word of this podcast and the topics that we discussed on our episodes. And at the end of the day. My goal is to empower as many people on their performance journey as possible. Thank you all so much again, and we'll see you next time.